Seven-Day Journaling Program: Core Values


This seven-day journaling program will help you recognize how narcissistic abuse has affected your core values and give yourself space and time to re-evaluate your core values. 

Recognizing and understanding the influence of narcissistic abuse on your core values is the starting point to reclaiming your identity.

Seven-Day Journaling Program

Day 1 – Identifying Core Values

  • Direction for the day: Start by writing down a list of what you consider to be your core values. This might include ideas such as honesty, loyalty, independence, compassion, and so on. Reflect on your life before the abuse occurred or even during, and try to remember what values you held dearly at that time.
  • Why should you do this? Understanding your starting point is key. By listing your core values, you can set a clear foundation for the rest of this exercise. It’s the first step in recognizing how those values might have changed or been affected by the abuse you suffered.

Day 2 – Reflection on the Impact of Narcissistic Abuse

  • Direction for the day: Reflect on each of your identified core values individually. Consider specific instances in your relationships with the narcissist where these values were compromised, invalidated, or completely dismissed. Write down these instances and associated feelings.
  • Why should you do this? This step will help you identify specific occasions where your values were threatened or undermined. Recognizing these instances will help you see the manipulation and control that were at play, bringing clarity to the ways in which the abuse affected your core values.

Day 3 – Your Values and the Narcissist’s Perception

  • Direction for the day: Reflect on how the narcissist perceived or responded to your core values. Did they appreciate and respect your values, or did they ridicule, dismiss, or belittle them? Jot down these observations.
  • Why should you do this? The objective here is to further recognize the inconsistencies and distortions in the narcissist’s reaction to your values. Understanding this can aid in your healing process, allowing you to separate their manipulation from your inherent beliefs.

Day 4 – Emotions Tied to Your Core Values

  • Direction for the day: Today, focus on the emotions you experience when you think about your core values being manipulated or dismissed. Try to dive deep into each emotion, understanding where it’s coming from and how it relates to each specific value.
  • Why should you do this? By connecting your emotions to your values, you can better validate your feelings and understand their origins. This can support your journey to reclaim your emotional landscape from the influence of the narcissistic abuse.

Day 5 – Identifying Change in Core Values

  • Direction for the day: Reflect on whether you’ve adjusted your core values as a result of the abuse. What values might you have dropped, adopted, or devalued to survive in the abusive environment?
  • Why should you do this? Recognizing changes in your values further elucidates the impact of the narcissistic abuse on your belief system. Understanding these changes is a key step in the process of reclaiming your authentic self.

Day 6 – Time of Re-evaluation

  • Direction for the day: Take a day to simply sit with your discoveries. Allow yourself the space and time to process what you’ve unearthed, without pressure to act or judge your feelings and thoughts.
  • Why should you do this? Giving yourself time to process your discoveries can lead to deeper understanding and acceptance. It’s a crucial part of the healing process and helps you prepare for the next phase of your journey.

Day 7 – Personal Understanding

  • Direction for the day: Today, write a letter to yourself summarizing your findings from the week. Discuss how you’ve seen your core values change, the emotions tied to these changes, and your understanding of the influence of the narcissistic abuse.
  • Why should you do this? This step will solidify your understanding of how the narcissistic abuse has affected your core values. It provides a comprehensive summary of your week of self-discovery and recognition, which can be an empowering conclusion to this healing exercise.