After learning about the narcissistic abuse cycle, a common question people ask is: “What exactly happens during the love bombing phase?”

During the love bombing phase, narcissists typically shower you with excessive attention, affection, gifts, and compliments to create a sense of urgency, dependency, and specialness. They mimic your desires, share personal secrets, and isolate you from others to gain power and control over you.

In this article, I will guide you through eleven things narcissists do during the love bombing phase so you can better understand this topic.

1.) They Overwhelm You with Attention and Affection

The first thing a narcissist could do during the love bombing phase is overwhelm you with attention and affection.

From the moment you meet, the narcissist will be highly attentive, always wanting to be around you and constantly expressing how much they care about you. 

A narcissist love bombing someone.

This can make you feel special and unique, as if you are the center of their world. 

Over time, it can cause you to develop a strong attachment and dependency on them.

2.) They Shower You with Compliments

The second thing a narcissist could do during the love bombing phase is shower you with compliments.

They will constantly tell you how amazing, intelligent, and attractive you are, even if you’ve just met or haven’t done anything noteworthy. 

As you can imagine, this can significantly boost your self-esteem.

It can also make you more inclined to overlook any red flags or negative behaviors because you are so flattered by their compliments.

3.) They Tell You That They Love You

The third, and arguably most common, thing a narcissist could do during the love bombing phase is tell you that they love you.

Suggested Reading: Can Narcissists Love?

The narcissist will quickly declare their love for you or suggest that you two are soulmates before you genuinely get to know each other. 

They might say something along the lines of, “I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. I know we’re meant to be together.”

This can create a sense of urgency and importance in the relationship, making you feel like you’ve found “the one” or a special connection. 

It can also make you more willing to commit quickly and deeply to the narcissist.

4.) They Make Grand Gestures and Give You Gifts

The fourth thing a narcissist could do during the love bombing phase is make grand gestures and give you many gifts.

It is important to note that these actions are often disproportionate to the stage or nature of your relationship. 

For example, the narcissist might give you expensive gifts or plan an elaborate surprise for you, even if you’ve only known each other briefly. 

A narcissist planning a surprise trip.

These grand gestures can make you feel special, unique, and valued, much like the other behaviors mentioned in this article.

It may also create a sense of obligation or debt towards the narcissist, making it harder for you to maintain independence from them.

5.) They Try to Be In Constant Contact with You

The fifth thing a narcissist could do during the love bombing phase is to try to be in constant contact with you.

They will text or call you multiple times throughout the day, even if you are busy or have told them you are unavailable.

Suggested Reading: How to Set Boundaries with a Narcissist (6 Steps)

Unfortunately, this constant communication, combined with all the other parts of love bombing, can create a sense of intimacy and connection. 

It can also become overwhelming and make you feel like you should always be available and responsive to the narcissist.

Here’s a quick side note: Being in constant contact with you is how narcissists begin to isolate you from others, something which I will discuss later in this article.

6.) They Show a Lot of Interest in Your Life and Activities

The sixth thing a narcissist could do during the love bombing phase is show a lot of interest in your life and activities.

They will ask you detailed questions about your day, interests, and feelings and will seem extraordinarily interested and attentive to your responses. 

This can make you feel seen and cared for because the narcissist values you. 

It can also cause you to depend on the narcissist for validation and support.

7.) They Tell You That You Are Special and Unique

The seventh thing a narcissist could do during the love bombing phase is tell you that you are special and unique.

They might say things like, “I’ve never met anyone like you before. You’re so different from everyone else.”

A narcissist lying to someone.

This can make you feel valued and important as if you are one-of-a-kind. 

It can also make you more inclined to overlook red flags or negative behaviors because the narcissist makes you feel seen, heard, and understood.

8.) They Make You the Center of Their World

The eighth thing a narcissist could do during the love bombing phase is make you the center of their world.

They commonly rearrange their schedule to be with you, drop everything to help you, and make you feel as if you are their top priority.

Much like the other tactics mentioned in this article, this can make you feel incredibly valued and cared for, making it harder for you to maintain your independence or establish boundaries with them.

9.) They Show a Willingness to Do Anything for You

The ninth thing a narcissist could do during the love bombing phase is show a willingness to do anything for you.

They will often go out of their way to do things for you, even if it is inconvenient, because they want you to believe there is nothing they wouldn’t do for you. 

This can make you feel cared for and supported. 

It can also create a sense of obligation or debt towards the narcissist, trapping you within the relationship for the time being.

10.) They Display a High Physical Affection and Intimacy

The tenth thing a narcissist could do during the love bombing phase is display high physical affection and intimacy towards you.

This could mean touching, hugging, or seeking physical closeness, even if you’ve just met or haven’t established a deep connection yet.

This can create a sense of closeness and connection quickly. 

It can also make you feel desired and valued. However, it may also create discomfort or pressure to reciprocate the physical affection or intimacy.

11.) They Share Personal Secrets or Stories to Create a Bond with You

The eleventh thing a narcissist could do during the love bombing phase is share personal secrets or stories to create a bond with you.

For instance, they might tell you a personal story about their past or struggles, making it seem like they trust you deeply. 

A narcissist sharing a personal story.

Similar to displaying high levels of physical affection and intimacy, this level of sharing can quickly create a sense of closeness and trust. 

11.) They Isolate You from Others by Monopolizing Your Time

The eleventh thing a narcissist could do during the love bombing phase is isolate you from others by monopolizing your time.

Suggested Reading: 5 Ways That Narcissists Isolate You

They might plan activities for every weekend or constantly ask to spend time with you, making it difficult for you to make plans with others. 

This can create a sense of dependency on the narcissist for social interaction.

It can also cause feelings of isolation and a loss of support from friends and family, making it difficult to distance yourself from the narcissist or leave the relationship.

What Should You Take Away from This Article?

The love bombing phase is going to be different for everyone. The items I listed in this article are the most common tactics I’ve seen/heard about.

But there could certainly be other behaviors narcissists have during the love bombing phase. I hope this article brought you value, thank you so much for reading it.

Suggested Reading: How to Protect Yourself Against Love Bombing (7 Steps)

About the Author

Hey, I’m Elijah.

I experienced narcissistic abuse for three years. 

I create these articles to help you understand and validate your experiences.

Thank you for reading, and remember, healing is possible even when it feels impossible.

If you’re ready to heal, visit The Institute of Healing from Narcissistic Abuse to get started.

References:

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