October 2, 2024 at 1:55pm EST

How to Shut Down Narcissistic Hoovering

Hey, 

It’s hard to resist a narcissist’s hoovering attempts when you miss them.

They could be the most abusive person on the planet.

But when you’re missing them…

It’s easy to get manipulated into giving the relationship another chance.

This is really dangerous because narcissists don’t change.

They’ll say and do all the right things.

But the second they realize they’ve got you hooked…

They’ll go right back to being abusive and manipulative.

So, I want to share a tactic with you that our community has been using to manage the narcissist’s hoovering attempts.

We call it the “Reality Jar.”

Here’s how it works:

Get a jar and label it “Reality Jar.”

Then, grab a stack of index cards and write down all the reasons you need to keep the narcissist out of your life. 

When you’re done, put the cards into the jar.

Then, the next time they’re hoovering, take the cards out and read them.

That’s it.

This exercise has been so effective for our community because it reminds us why it’s not safe to let the narcissist back in.

I hope it does the same for you.

Juliana