It is common to question your sanity after months, years, or even decades of being gaslighted by someone regularly.

Five things you can do to regain your sanity after being gaslighted are journaling, setting healthy boundaries, educating yourself on gaslighting, learning how to trust yourself again, and surrounding yourself with supportive people. 

In this article, I will guide you through these five actions you can take to help you better understand how they can help you regain your sanity.

1.) Journaling

Journaling helps you regain your sanity after experiencing gaslighting because it provides a concrete, tangible record of your thoughts, feelings, and experiences. 

When you’re being gaslighted, you’re often made to feel like your perception of reality is incorrect, which can lead to self-doubt and confusion. 

Having a written record of your experiences can help you trust your memory and perceptions again.

For example, imagine your friend has agreed to meet you at a certain time and place. 

Later, they arrive late and claim they never agreed to meet at the originally agreed time and instead accuse you of getting the time wrong. 

A woman being gaslighted.

Confused and frustrated, you start to doubt your memory of the agreement.

Fortunately, you have a habit of journaling. 

So you wrote down the details of the agreement after making the plans.

This means you can refer back to your journal and confirm whether or not you are remembering the arrangement correctly.

Guess what?

According to your journal entry, you are remembering the arrangement correctly!

Having the ability to do this helps you reinforce your trust in your memory and perception of the event despite your friend’s conflicting account.

Now, let’s take this a step further.

You’ve realized that someone you consider a friend is gaslighting you.

This could bring up a lot of painful emotions for you.

But don’t worry because journaling can also help you process your emotions and make sense of your experiences. 

Writing down your feelings can provide a release and help you understand and manage them better. 

It’s a way of conversing with yourself, which can be incredibly therapeutic.

2.) Setting Boundaries

If you didn’t know already, boundaries are the limits you set for yourself regarding what you will and will not accept from others. 

Suggested Reading: How to Set Boundaries with a Narcissist (6 Steps)

They’re a way of communicating your needs and protecting yourself from harm. 

After experiencing gaslighting, you will most likely discover that your boundaries have been eroded or ignored.

Reestablishing these boundaries and communicating them clearly to others is an important step to regain your sanity.

For example, imagine someone trying to manipulate you or dismiss your feelings.

You can assert your boundaries by calmly and confidently stating that this behavior is unacceptable and you will not tolerate it. 

A woman trying to set a boundary.

This can help you create a safe space for yourself physically and emotionally, strengthening your sense of agency. 

This sense of agency is crucial for taking control of your life, making decisions in your best interest, healing from gaslighting, and regaining your sanity.

3.) Educating Yourself on Gaslighting

Educating yourself about gaslighting is crucial for regaining your sanity because it helps you understand the nature of the manipulation you experienced. 

Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse that involves manipulating someone into doubting their perceptions, memories, or sanity. 

It’s a subtle and insidious tactic that can be hard to recognize, especially when it’s coming from someone close to you.

For example, if you were constantly told by a partner that you’re too sensitive or imagining things, you might start to believe it and doubt your feelings. 

Why?

Well, because they are your partner. They are supposed to want the best for you. 

It can be hard to acknowledge you are being abused when the abuser is someone you believe loves you.

However, understanding the tactics used in gaslighting and its effects on your mental health can help you recognize the manipulation for what it is.

Seeing the gaslighting for what it is will help you identify red flags in relationships and protect yourself from further manipulation. 

Knowledge is power, and understanding the dynamics of gaslighting can be a crucial step toward healing and regaining your sanity.

4.) Learning How to Trust Yourself Again

Learning to trust yourself again after experiencing gaslighting is fundamental for regaining your sanity.

Suggested Reading: 10 Ways to Trust Yourself After Narcissistic Abuse

This is because gaslighting undermines your trust in your perception of reality, which causes a profound sense of self-doubt.

Regaining self-trust helps you reclaim your sense of reality by validating your experiences and perceptions despite the gaslighter’s attempts to distort them. 

Therefore, by rebuilding self-trust, you restore your mental footing, regain your sanity, and help yourself rebuild a healthy, self-affirmed life after gaslighting.

5.) Surround Yourself with Supportive People

Surrounding yourself with people who support you is important for regaining your sanity after gaslighting.

This is because it helps counteract the isolation and self-doubt that gaslighting often causes. 

Gaslighters often manipulate their targets into doubting not only their perceptions but also the intentions and trustworthiness of others.

This can cause you to become isolated from your support network and feel helpless.

For example, a gaslighter might tell you that your friends or family don’t really care about you or that they are saying negative things about you behind your back. 

A narcissist trying to isolate someone from their family.

This can make you feel isolated and distrustful of those who care about you.

Seeking and surrounding yourself with supportive people who affirm your experiences and feelings can be incredibly healing. 

It can help you feel seen, heard, and understood, which is crucial for regaining your sanity, sense of self-worth, and confidence after being gaslighted.

What Should You Take Away from This Article?

Gaslighting is a powerful tactic abusive people use to manipulate others into questioning their memories, reality, and sanity. 

I hope this article has given you a better understanding of some tactics you can use to regain your sanity after being gaslighted.

About the Author

Hey, I’m Elijah.

I experienced narcissistic abuse for three years. 

I create these articles to help you understand and validate your experiences.

Thank you for reading, and remember, healing is possible even when it feels impossible.

If you’re ready to heal, visit The Institute of Healing from Narcissistic Abuse to get started.

References:

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