Have you ever wondered why going no contact is so often recommended to those trying to protect themselves and heal from narcissistic relationships?

If so, you’re not alone. One of our community members recently asked, “Why is it important to have no contact with a narcissist?”

So, I dove into the research, and here’s what I learned.

Going no contact with an narcissistic person is essential because it:

  • Breaks the cycle of abuse.
  • Enables emotional healing and recovery.
  • Protects your mental and physical well-being.
  • Empowers you to rebuild your life.
  • Reduces the risk of manipulation and coercion.
  • Encourages self-discovery and growth.
  • Helps you build a healthy support network.

In this post, I will explain each of these reasons to help you understand why going no contact with a narcissistic person is so important.

If you have or currently are experiencing narcissistic abuse, visit Unfilteredd’s Institute of Healing from Narcissistic Abuse for help.

1) It Breaks the Cycle of Abuse

Going no contact is crucial because it helps break the cycle of abuse

In healthy relationships, both parties respect each other’s boundaries and feelings. 

They work through conflicts in ways that strengthen their bond. 

However, in a narcissistic relationship, the narcissist often violates boundaries, uses manipulation, and cycles between harming and apologizing to keep control over the person they’re abusing.

A narcissist giving a fake apology.

By going no contact, you remove yourself from this harmful cycle.1 

It’s like stepping off a carousel that’s been spinning out of control. 

This distance not only provides you with the space to heal but also prevents the narcissist from inflicting further emotional or physical harm. 

It’s a vital step towards reclaiming your independence and well-being, allowing you to start building a life free from abuse.

2) It Enables Emotional Healing and Recovery

Another important reason for going no contact with a narcissist is that it enables emotional healing and recovery.2 

In a healthy relationship, both parties support each other’s growth and healing. 

They face challenges together and emerge stronger. 

Conversely, in a narcissistic relationship, the constant stress, fear, and manipulation can leave deep emotional scars. 

Going no contact provides the necessary peace and safety to begin addressing these wounds. 

Without the narcissist’s constant presence and influence, you can start to work through your feelings, rebuild your self-esteem, and regain your strength. 

It’s like giving yourself a clean slate where you can rediscover who you are and what you value in life, away from the shadow of abuse. 

This process is essential for healing and lays the foundation for healthier relationships in the future.

Suggested Reading: How to Heal from Narcissistic Abuse

3) It Protects Your Mental and Physical Well-Being

Establishing no contact is crucial for protecting your mental and physical well-being. 

In healthy relationships, individuals feel uplifted, supported, and safe.3

However, in an environment tainted by abuse, the constant stress and anxiety can have severe effects on both your mental and physical health, leading to issues like depression, anxiety, and even physical symptoms caused by stress.4 

A woman trying to protect her well-being.

By going no contact, you shield yourself from these harmful influences, similar to how stepping out of a smoky room allows you to breathe fresh air again. 

This separation stops the direct source of stress and harm, giving your mind and body the chance to recover and heal.5 

It’s an essential step in prioritizing your health and affirming that you deserve to live a life free from abuse.

4) It Empowers You to Rebuild Your Life

Going no contact with a narcissist also empowers you to rebuild your life on your own terms. 

In a healthy dynamic, both parties encourage each other’s independence and personal growth. 

Abuse, however, undermines your autonomy, making you feel powerless and dependent on the narcissist.6 

Cutting off contact is like breaking free from chains that have been holding you back. 

It signifies reclaiming control over your life and decisions, marking the beginning of a journey where you can set goals, make choices that reflect your true self, and pursue activities and relationships that bring you joy. 

This process of rebuilding is not just about distancing yourself from the narcissist but about taking proactive steps towards creating a fulfilling life that you control, reinforcing your sense of self-worth and capability.

Suggested Reading: 10 Ways to Love Yourself After Narcissistic Abuse

If you need help with anything related to narcissistic abuse, visit Unfilteredd’s Institute of Healing from Narcissistic Abuse today.

5) It Reduces the Risk of Manipulation and Coercion

Initiating no contact is vital to reduce the risk of manipulation and coercion.7 

In healthy relationships, communication is based on mutual respect and honesty, allowing both individuals to express their needs and concerns freely.8 

In contrast, narcissists often exploit communication to manipulate, deceive, or coerce their targets into compliance, using guilt, threats, or false promises to maintain their control. 

A woman trying to gaslight someone.

By going no contact, you effectively cut off these channels of manipulation, like sealing a leak that’s been slowly poisoning the water.

This action protects you from the narcissist’s attempts to distort your reality and make you question your perceptions and decisions. 

It’s a critical step in safeguarding your autonomy and ensuring that your choices are truly your own, free from the narcissist’s influence.

Suggested Reading: How to Protect Yourself from Narcissistic Abuse

6) It Encourages Self-Discovery and Growth

Going no contact is not just about escaping a narcissistic situation; it’s also an opportunity for self-discovery and personal growth. 

In the confines of a narcissistic relationship, your identity can become intertwined with the relationship and the narcissist’s perception of you.9 

Healthy relationships, in contrast, allow each individual to explore their interests, pursue personal growth, and evolve independently within the partnership. 

Cutting off contact with the narcissist acts as a catalyst for self-discovery, like launching a solo journey into new, uncharted territory. 

It provides the freedom to explore your interests, rediscover passions that were set aside, and engage in new experiences without fear of judgment or reprisal. 

A woman reading a book during the no-contact period.

This process of self-exploration and growth is crucial for healing. 

It helps you build a stronger, more confident self rooted in your values and achievements.

Suggested Reading: 10 Ways to Grow as a Person After Narcissistic Abuse 

7) It Helps You Build a Healthy Support Network

Finally, going no contact with a narcissist opens the door to fostering a supportive network of relationships. 

In a narcissistic dynamic, isolation is a common tactic used to weaken your support system and increase your dependence on the narcissist. 

On the other hand, healthy relationships thrive on support, mutual respect, and the strength of community. 

By removing the narcissist from your life, you create space for positive relationships that uplift and empower you.10 

This supportive network is invaluable for your recovery and growth, providing a foundation of love and respect that contrasts sharply with the dynamics of abuse. 

Rebuilding connections with friends, family, or support groups reinforces the idea that you are not alone and that relationships can be sources of strength and joy, not fear and control.

Suggested Resource: Building a Healthy Support Network: Insights from a Therapist

If you are ready to be more than a victim of narcissistic abuse, visit Unfilteredd’s Institute of Healing from Narcissistic Abuse today.

Conclusion

Thank you so much for reading; I hope you found this article insightful.

Now, I’d love to hear from you!

Have you ever made the decision to go no contact with a narcissist? 

How did this choice impact your journey toward healing and self-discovery?

What challenges did you face in maintaining no contact, and how did you overcome them?

Or perhaps you’re contemplating taking this step and are looking for guidance or support in making this significant change.

Either way, let me know by leaving a comment below.

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About the Author

Hey, I’m Elijah.

I experienced narcissistic abuse for several years and was shocked by just how common it is. I create these articles to spread awareness.

But I’m not alone—there are many others here at Unfilteredd, all dedicated to helping people like you live a life free from the effects of narcissistic abuse.

If you’d like to learn more about how we can help, please click the button below.

Unfilteredd has strict sourcing guidelines and only uses high-quality sources to support the facts within our content. You can learn more about how we ensure our content is accurate, actionable, inclusive, and trustworthy by reading our editorial process.

  1. Wendy Rose Gould. (2023. June, 12). Why the “No Contact” Rule Is So Important After a Breakup. Verywell Mind. https://www.verywellmind.com/no-contact-rule-after-a-breakup-7501465 ↩︎
  2. Hillary Carmona. (2023. September, 28). The No Contact Rule: What it Is & When to Use it. Choosing Therapy. https://www.choosingtherapy.com/no-contact-rule/ ↩︎
  3. New York State. What Does a Healthy Relationship Look Like? https://www.ny.gov/teen-dating-violence-awareness-and-prevention/what-does-healthy-relationship-look ↩︎
  4. Nemours Teens Health. (2023. August). Abuse: What You Need to Know. Nemours Teens Health. https://kidshealth.org/en/teens/family-abuse.html ↩︎
  5. Asa Don Brown, Aly Rusciano. (2024. February, 6). How to Use the No Contact Rule. wikiHow. https://www.wikihow.com/Use-the-No-Contact-Rule ↩︎
  6. Darlene Lancer. (2021. June, 1). How Trauma Can Rob Us of Our Power and Makes Us Feel Helpless. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/toxic-relationships/202106/how-trauma-can-rob-us-our-power-and-makes-us-feel-helpless ↩︎
  7. Lena Dicken. (2022. September, 9). How to Prevent Yourself from Being Manipulated. wikiHow. https://www.wikihow.com/Prevent-Yourself-from-Being-Manipulated ↩︎
  8. Better Health Channel. (2022. February, 24). Relationships and communication. Better Health Channel. https://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/health/healthyliving/relationships-and-communication# ↩︎
  9. Andrea Schneider. (2013. June, 18). Recovering from Narcissistic Abuse, Part II: The No-Contact Rule. GoodTherapy. https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/no-contact-rule-recovering-from-narcissistic-abuse-0618136 ↩︎
  10. Eric, a Hotline Advocate. Tips on Rebuilding and Maintaining Support After the Isolation of Abuse. National Domestic Violence Hotline. https://www.thehotline.org/resources/tips-on-rebuilding-and-maintaining-support-after-the-isolation-of-abuse/ ↩︎

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